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Wise Future Self


A few weekends ago, I was in Sonoma, California, with my friends Sarah Jenks and Liz DiAlto, so Sarah and I could have a photoshoot for our upcoming LIVE FREE Retreat and the 3 of us could hang. Girltime.

Sonoma is ridiculously gorgeous. Look at these pictures from one of our afternoons there…


Throughout the weekend, we talked a lot about what we wanted. We painted pictures for one another of what we see on the horizon: upcoming launches, growing teams, deepening relationships and deeper connections with ourselves. We also talked a lot about how things are for us right now: our loves, lifestyles, philosophies and favorite loungewear brands. We covered it all.

Looking back, a common theme throughout the weekend was an inquiry into rules.

What rules are we following, and whose rules are they, anyways?

We lovingly challenged one another to look at the places where we were playing by rules that prevented us from having what we really want in life right now, taking a stand for one another’s dreams becoming a reality and loving the journey now.

On our first day there, Sarah announced that we were going to do our photoshoot at a beautiful winery…where we didn’t have permission to shoot.  To top it all off, we had our hair and makeup done, but weren’t in our outfits yet.  Where were we going to change, I thought, as we drove up.  Nervous, I said “What if we get busted and have to change locations?  I’m scared we’ll lose daylight.”  “Don’t worry, we’ll make it work”, she said with a confident smile. And she meant it.  She decided that instead of following the rules, we’d walk in and be as genuinely warm and kind as ever, and it would all work out fine.  Here we are at the bar, right after walking in:

nisha liz sarah

The next day at brunch, Liz looked over the rim of her coffee mug and said, “I live on vacation.” And she meant it.  Liz recently moved to the beach and made changes to her business that give her a ton of freedom and flexibility in her schedule.  She’s made a decision: to create the conditions in her life right now so that her life feels like one big beach holiday. She created her own rules to play by.  I captured the moment:

liz d

Women ask me all the time: “Can you make these choices now because you’ve paid your dues?” 

While it’s true that all the hustle-hustle-hustle is part of our stories and contributed to bringing us here, it was when we chose to play by our own rules that our lives and businesses blossomed.  Suffering is (and was) always optional.

> Sarah chose to ditch her diet before she lost the weight and her own rules helped her drop 30lbs, fall back in love with her man, and be a way happier human being.

> Liz chose to turn her life into a vacation instead of hustling to earn short vacations and within 6 months, her own rules helped her bring in her previous years’ income and be a way happier human being.

> I chose to begin traveling before I had my business “figured out” and my own rules helped me find my perfect business model, more than triple my income and be a way happier human being.

The truth is, we always have choice, and we can always create our own rules to live by.

Right now, scan your life and notice anywhere that you are stuck, frustrated or unhappy…

Ask yourself these 4 questions:
1. What do I want in this area of my life?
2. What rules am I following that are preventing me from having that now?
3. Whose rules are these?
4. What rules do I want to play by, starting now?

In the comments below, share what new rules you’ll be playing by, so you can be empowered to create what you want now.