Dear Sweet Child,
Thank you for bearing the pain of
a family that wasn’t always united.
Thank you for loving your body in a
world that says your body is wrong.
Thank you for holding visions of magic
that have inspired those who love you.
Thank you for feeling the feelings
that felt too big to understand.
Thank you for wanting good things
for the earth and her people.
My Dear Sweet Child,
I am sorry for forgetting about you.
For treating you harshly.
For being impatient with you.
For not listening.
My Dear Sweet Child,
Thank you for living on inside of me.
I promise to take care of you.
I promise to love you.
I promise to listen.
– Nisha Moodley
This is so narcissistic!
Is self-love really narcissistic?
How might self-love serve others?
True self-love is not narcissistic but I find that your infantilizing, sentimental poem about it is, that’s all.
I understand how it could be taken that way.
In the practice of NLP (a method for re-patterning
beliefs, which I have studied), one of the things
we learn is how to “re-claim” parts of ourselves
that were hurt in childhood.
We do this not just in the name of self-love, but
to free ourselves from outdated belief patterns
that wreak havoc in our lives now (even in subtle
ways), so we can live more loving and fulfilled
lives, and ultimately contribute to the world in
a bigger way. When we aren’t expending a bunch of
energy in protecting ourselves from being hurt again,
we can use all of that energy to be of service.
Here’s a related blog post I wrote about this “inner child”
and how we might relate to her in an empowering way, in
case you’re interested to understand my thoughts on this:
Actually this is a very common thing to do when healing from codependency. It’s not narcissistic at all. It seems scary to imagine sharing such a personal thing on a blog, in fact. So nice job, Nisha.
To the inner child in all of us.
Thanks for your thoughts on this, Alison.
I do agree that looking lovingly upon
ourselves as children is incredibly
healing, and can take us from acting
like stunted children to being fully
vibrant and healthy adults.
By the way, I love your website!
I LOVE YOU NISHA, <3
Thank you, Bern 🙂
I’d love to hear the ode to the boy that is you!
While I can’t speak to the ‘girl’ in me, I am still very moved by this. In the past week, I have had three separate friends reach out and ask for relationship coaching. It is something I am known for, as I had to become an expert at ‘being’ in a relationship to attract and keep my beautiful wife around in the early stages of our new-found love. What I am moved by is that I have come so far. The connective string in all of the coaching I did this week is that all three people could not yet trust how amazing and perfect they truly are. So, I hold the space for them. I am able to hold that space because I am awesome, I am perfectly flawed and I love myself for it. I am me, and that is great, and I am grateful. It is an amazing life to live when you are whole and complete and you can offer that to others. Thank you Nisha for your willingness to give, your acceptance of yourself makes it possible for others. Much love. Jeremy
Thank you so much for sharing this.
I absolutely love this:
“I am awesome, I am perfectly flawed and I love myself for it.”
This is the exact attitude that will
have our children love themselves
and others, fully and without fear.
Wow Jeremy…will you be MY friend? 😀 You sound like an awesome friend to have!! 🙂 Hannah
I love this Nisha.
Thank you, Jill!
Absolutely love this. Thank you so much for sharing. I LOVE how you are showing up in the world! It inspires me to kick fear in the teeth and follow my heart. Thank you!
Thank you so much, Audra.
Do you care to share an ode
to the girl that’s inside you?
I’d love to witness it 🙂
ahhhh looove this so much. I am a deep love affair with my younger self, giving her space, kindness, compassion and love to be with, heal and honor what happened to her in our younger years. Thank you for sharing this so openly and so poetically…so powerful.
You are doing amazing work love. Your voice, presence makes a difference. xo Kimberly
Thank you so much, Kimberly.
Your words are absolute music to my ears.
Taped next to my bed, is a photo of myself, at four or five years old.
I have some memories of childhood that involve fear, embarrassment, and confusion- but the memory captured in this photograph is pure joy, pride and happiness.
On top of my head, sits an awesome blue-sequined hat that me and my mom found at a garage sale. It was attached to my head for the whole summer.
On my face- a smile. The kind of smile people talk about when they say ‘ear-to ear’
In my hands I am holding up a kite- showing it to the camera, sharing it with the world.
I am smiling ear to ear because I had won the kite. My mom had taken myself and my brother to a childrens day at Beacon Hill Park. There was a kite decorating contest there. I went bananas! I was born to work with my hands, and be creative, and make art. Even now, I have a vivid memory of them calling my name after they had judged the kites that the children had created. As a prize for my piece, I was awarded a long, multi-coloured kite that would actually fly (it got trapped in the blackberry bushes in front of grandmas, but was fun while it lasted).
I have this photo next to my bed because it is the first vivid memory I have of myself being awarded for being creative.
I would go on spending many years of my life not feeling supported in my creative endeavours. A school system that supports science and math over art, and writing.
Dear Sweet Child: I’m sorry for suppressing the creative fire and passion, and purpose for so long. Gradually, I have observed and broken down the walls that I built up around that spirit. There aren’t many bricks left- I can feel everyday that I am getting closer and closer to living art and creativity as my purpose. I work at a children’s art studio and get to experience the world through their eyes- no rules laid yet. Draw outside the lines, or inside the lines- however we choose.
Dear Sweet Child: thank you for being patient.
I am listening now! And thriving! We are in-spirit, and miracles are in the air.
Chelsea, this is gorgeous!
Thank you for sharing, sister.
I am beaming along with you
and your unleashed creativity.
Your post is eerily well-timed. I am deep in parenting a 10 y/o boy, having his 10 y/o experience, and in witnessing and presence, he is also crying my 10 y/o tears, pain, truth. I thank the girl that is me for enduring neglect. Because she did, I am an adult who is well resourced to fuel myself, my family, my community/world.
Love you so much, JE.
You are such an awesome mama.
Dear sweet Nisha. Thank you for being my sweet child. I am thankful that my young self did not allow the bullying, isolation and enforced conformity of my early years to change the intelligent, quirky artist within. I was too shy to make friends and too strong to stand in the shadows, but I remained true to myself. I am still that giggling, quirky kid that likes to blow bubbles, hatch crazy plans and read dictionaries. I am thankful that I have you, your brother and your papa to celebrate with.
Momma, I love you!
You really are still that giggling,
quirky kid that likes to blow bubbles,
hatch crazy plans and read dictionaries.
Thank you for being my teacher.
Wow, I was just talking to my therapist today about how to hold my little one when ‘she’ is acting out, feeling less than and awkward. Thank you for acknowledging what is so deeply necessary for all of us to do, even if it feels a bit odd or out there or whatever. I am learning to surrender and really love a take care of myself.
We heal ourselves, we heal the world. As women we are a reflection of mother earth and in order to care for her, we must go inwards and deep and heal and care for ourselves.
Have a beautiful weekend!
Maria, thank you so much for this.
I really resonate with this:
” As women we are a reflection of mother earth and in order to care for her, we must go inwards and deep and heal and care for ourselves.”
Beautiful : )
Thank you, Mimi 🙂
Love this! I have a picture of a 2 year old me that I regularly chat with. I KNOW having this type of a relationship with our younger selves is paramount to a woman rising up and fully expressing herself. Thank you so much for sharing this.
I love that, Kerry! Seeing your picture here,
I can imagine what a sweet little girl you were 🙂
Thank you so much for taking the time to join the conversation.
This is interesting. I just read Kamal Rivikant’s book, “Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It” last night! When we feel good we can serve others in so many ways. Amen Sister!! Thanks for sharing. PS you are going to make an amazing Mom!